Mysty Pfeffer“The sacrifice pleasing to God is a broken spirit. God, you will not despise a broken and humbled heart Psalm 51:17 (HCSB)
The love of Christ and my own shy personality usually frees me from attention-seeking behavior. The revolting thought of negative notoriety is this introvert’s worst nightmare. Did you see the American lady making “British eggs” in England? Only to be shamed as a fake! Putting yourself out there is so risky in our easily riled culture.
Therefore, it’s no surprise that intimidation knocks at the door of my confidence when compelled into the spotlight of extreme attention. The kind that whispers, are you sure you want them to see and hear all of you?
Sitting with my back to the wall is my preferred place to observe and soak in my surroundings. You know, stowed away from presumptuous ears that assess my intelligence with a slight twitch of the eyebrow when they hear my Kentucky accent.
Yes, ladies are in tune with those not so subtle looks from others. I take a deep, calming breath as the dreaded once-over begins. The softer, approval seeker in me feels her sails inflate when met with acceptance. While the intimidated loner bristles with momentary self-doubt if she bumps against haughtiness. However, a sure-footed contentment in a Savior’s love overcomes momentary affirmation from others as a distinct truth is realized; I am average and it’s ok.
Average in appearance and knowledge maybe, yet far beyond what others observe on the surface.
Hidden to the observer in that split-second, critical glance is an extraordinarily reformed spirit! The Holy Spirit counsels and calms my doubtful heart awaiting a second cursory gaze from the onlooker. He defines my worth, not others. He fills my soul with satisfaction and spurs me on to live for Jesus. He calms quaking emotions while assuring me, I am accepted by Him. Because my heart is pure. He washed me clean with the blood of His sacrifice on the cross, and I received His grace the day I placed my faith in Him.
So, when the observer’s eyes rise for reassessment, the radiance of a fulfilled heart may take them aback. Perhaps, their perspective narrows as they see something beyond the exterior human face before them.
They see a heart filled with Jesus and an eagerness to please Him. The average appearance disguises, at first, a repaired spirit. A sprit once broken in a world where physical appearance is paramount. Although, the once broken spirit never measures up physically to flawless skin, perfect size, and great hair; she is free from the chains of imperfection seen daily in the mirror.
In its place is an awareness that too many years are spent seeking outward perfection. The realization is the true beauty of a humbled heart in love with her redeeming savior. A sacrifice noticed in heavenly places and stirring wonder in men and women who encounter its humbleness.
